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I was married to a man for nearly six years - we had sex twice during that time.We went for therapy, and things improved for a while. He was affectionate and loving in other ways - just not sexually. I started out being understanding and kind, then the resentment built up, from me and him.Often couple dynamic influence his withdrawal, but I have specifically referred to "desiring" women in this case... Sex becomes a chore and "spicing it up" is just useless advice.Of course, there are dynamics where "wanting" can only be felt by one of them at a time... I just couldn't perform for my wife after a while -- too much baggage.Well, so much for the stereotypes about men just wanting sex while women just want romantic fulfillment and emotional connection.I see so many comments like these from women all over the internet.Boys can internalize the idea that being dependent makes them less male. Erectile dysfunction, early ejaculation, and delayed ejaculation might have diverse causes but their common factors—a man’s frustration, worry and feelings of inadequacy—can shut things down sexually between you. A second part was a 20-something, feminist male who thought sex was degrading for women.
My problem has been going on for our entire marriage, I'm a very sexual, sensual woman. I've asked him why he is like this, first in an understanding way, now I'm just angry.With hindsight I realised that although I was desperate for him to change and be the man he promised he could be, only I had the power to change and save myself.Whatever you decide to do, I wish you the best of luck.Also this new man probably won’t have all the other great qualities that the previous man did, adding insult to injury.So unless a woman wants to roll the dice, she might be better off trying to make peace with her current situation.
When men are passionately involved with their careers, they can sublimate sexual excitement that would normally be directed toward their wives. He doesn't want to negotiate sex and so takes his desire, literally, into his own hands.